Right now the world is turning, the blood is pumping through my veins, muscles are twitching, neurons are firing in my brain… Decisions need to be made. Right now an action or a non-action is occurring and impacting my future. Right now I am in the present and almost in the future. I can never be in the future and I can never be in the past. I am always leaving one to reach the other. I am forgetting the past and dreaming the future, but mentally I am not here right now in the only place I can really ever be.
I bring myself back here. I force myself to notice now. The sky is grey. The buildings are grey. The white walls of my office appear grey. The white desk looks grey. The dust on my monitor makes it look grey. Everything is grey. I look to the future or the past to see a different color to grey. Winter is not white, it is grey. Life feels grey.
Here at work, I do not feel alive. I shut down my passions and dreams. I activate the robot in me and work. An email arrives. It triggers an emotion – irritation, anger. I am alive again, robot mode is deactivated. I ignore the email saving it for later, saving it for robot mode. I work at re-activating robot mode. The pain lessens and I work in peace again. Six more hours to go.
Daily Prompt: Write Here, Write Now
Write a post entirely in the present tense.